In a cellular funk
Yesterday I was in such a funk, I was ready to throw in the towel, but today I feel better. I'm still not totally over it, but definitely back on the upswing. In addition to getting a B on my Assessment exam, I got a B on my Fundamentals exam. Now one B I can handle, but two is just too much. Then I started looking at all my mid-term grades. With that second B, I managed to pull all my classes down to a B. Then my professor for Fundamentals e-mailed that she had thrown out a question which brought my grade up enough to keep me in an A for that class. The exam grade was still a 90 which in nursing school is a B. (Don’t tell me that B’s are good. I know that. They just aren’t good enough for me. Yes, I know I have issues!)
Considering the fact that I had studied for a total of 19 hours in two days for those exams in addition to every spare minute the week before, it was especially devastating to find out that my worst fears have been confirmed in regard to taking leave from work. I will no longer be able to put in for leave without pay. All leave without pay has been turned down and even some of the requests with annual leave. I spoke with my manager about it because I knew it was coming. He said he was quite torn about my situation because he wanted to do all he could for me since I had given so much to them for so long. I do still have 20-some hours of paid annual leave left, so I'm going to be putting in for 1 full day a week instead of 3 half days. That will only last me for 2 weeks, but by that time they have plans to have rehired some people previously let go, so hopefully I'll be able to get some more leave without pay.
After that I felt the need to do something extreme like drive really fast, or watch a cry movie, or listen to music really loudly. I can't afford a speeding ticket, and crying gives me a headache, so I pounded out my frustration on my keyboard at work while listening to the song I want sung at my funeral cranked way up. It did make me feel better after a while.
Currently, I'm working on my first care plan that has to be turned in next Tuesday. It wouldn't be so difficult except that I have to give the scientific rationale all the way to the cellular level for each of my interventions. I was working on it so long today that my frame of mind has turned totally cellular. Tonight at work after my fourth hour of keying, I was thinking to myself that my bum really hurt from sitting so long. But then I had to put it in more scientific terms: more than 32 mm Hg of pressure was being applied to the capillaries perfusing the tissue around my ischial tuberosity, thus occluding the capillaries and causing ischemia evidenced by reactive hyperemia which, if sustained more than 2 hours, would result in hypoxia which could eventually lead to cellular necrosis and a stage I pressure ulcer. I must admit, it tweaked my funny bone and I had to smirk.
I was invited to my first punk rock/beer party! I couldn't help but giggle at the thought.
Considering the fact that I had studied for a total of 19 hours in two days for those exams in addition to every spare minute the week before, it was especially devastating to find out that my worst fears have been confirmed in regard to taking leave from work. I will no longer be able to put in for leave without pay. All leave without pay has been turned down and even some of the requests with annual leave. I spoke with my manager about it because I knew it was coming. He said he was quite torn about my situation because he wanted to do all he could for me since I had given so much to them for so long. I do still have 20-some hours of paid annual leave left, so I'm going to be putting in for 1 full day a week instead of 3 half days. That will only last me for 2 weeks, but by that time they have plans to have rehired some people previously let go, so hopefully I'll be able to get some more leave without pay.
After that I felt the need to do something extreme like drive really fast, or watch a cry movie, or listen to music really loudly. I can't afford a speeding ticket, and crying gives me a headache, so I pounded out my frustration on my keyboard at work while listening to the song I want sung at my funeral cranked way up. It did make me feel better after a while.
Currently, I'm working on my first care plan that has to be turned in next Tuesday. It wouldn't be so difficult except that I have to give the scientific rationale all the way to the cellular level for each of my interventions. I was working on it so long today that my frame of mind has turned totally cellular. Tonight at work after my fourth hour of keying, I was thinking to myself that my bum really hurt from sitting so long. But then I had to put it in more scientific terms: more than 32 mm Hg of pressure was being applied to the capillaries perfusing the tissue around my ischial tuberosity, thus occluding the capillaries and causing ischemia evidenced by reactive hyperemia which, if sustained more than 2 hours, would result in hypoxia which could eventually lead to cellular necrosis and a stage I pressure ulcer. I must admit, it tweaked my funny bone and I had to smirk.
I was invited to my first punk rock/beer party! I couldn't help but giggle at the thought.
posted by Sara | 7:36 PM
1 Comments:
Wow a blog I can comment on without being a member! Wowee! I enjoy your blog, Sara. The struggle of juggling job, school, and personal life is a difficult one as you well know. Sounds like you're assimilating the material though. My word, what a write up for a tired butt! Courage! Some day this learning curve will all be history and you'll have to go back and read your old blogs to remember what it was like.
Blessings, Teresa (from MD)
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